Friday, November 4, 2011

Assignment #5 - College Application

     I am one the most important and unique people in the world. At first glace, however, you may disagree, and in that case you would be completely and utterly incorrect. Many people would define me as a daredevil, completely insane and an avid writer of poetry. I think that everyone else is weak and cowardly. I once bought something from Walmart at half price. One of my more impressive accomplishments is my recent visit to the bottom of the Mariana Trench, a dangerous and costly endeavour; for me although, it was nothing but a couple hours taken out of my Sunday afternoon.

     A great hobby of mine is catching sharks with my bare hands, an easy task but impressive considering that all you are is a college application reviewer. Some of the activities I do in my spare time include biking to the top of Mount Everest, building orphanages in poor countries and turning water into wine. I sucessfully drew a picture of an elephant climbing a ladder. Once I had the great pleasure to assist Superman in foiling Lex Luthor's evil plans while both of my arms were broken. I was a member of my local high school chess club. One time I had the amazing opportunity to play as Darth Vader in Star Wars: Episode IV.

     If I was accepted into this primitive and low-standard college I can guarantee that by the end of the first semester I will have won all the awards possible, have 101% in each class and received every scholarship that is availableOnce I have received my college diploma, one of my many goals in life is to finally achieve world peace by becoming the leader of every country in the world, start the construction of a luxury 5-star hotel on Mars and fight Mr. Van Camp.

     I have accomplished all these things, however, I still haven't done one thing: having gone to college.

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